Responsible Parenting 102

We teach our children the importance of physical fitness at least...

Responsible Parenting 101

Random facebook posting brought to you by www.lamebook.com and the excessivley lol'ing Good Wood

I Pledge Allegiance To My Own Stupidity

I used to think these were the two biggest morons I'd ever heard of:

But then I took a really closer look at the Family Leader pledge that all GOP candidates were asked to sign. The family leader is a non-profit organization of Evangelicals in Iowa who push the virtue of the 50s TV sitcom version of families.  I hadn't even heard of this at all until I read Gary Johnson's blog. Gary Johnson (who I am increasingly excited about) was the first to refuse to sign the pledge and actually called it "offensive." The above idiots were the first to jump aboard and sign. Of course. Considering their social views and comments each has made about homosexuality, religion, and family, it comes as no surprise. 

Then I read the thing. You should take some time to do so youself right now if you haven't already. You can do that here.

Who the fuck is stupid enough to come up with such a document? How can you possibly discuss the fact that half of all first marriages and 60% of all remarriages end in divorce then state there is empirical evidence which shows married people have better health, sex, blah blah lies blah bullshit? Not to mention comments about slavery and the innocent fruit of conjugal intimacy...

This just goes to show how large the portion of Americans is who have not yet advanced past the days of Reefer Madness mentality. It's sad and ridiculously embarrassing to be associated with these low-class, narrow-minded freedom-haters. 

It's time to get to work on this commune. 

Intelligent By Design

Michele Bachman's definition of Natural Selection:  and natural selection is not the same thing as evolution. No one that I know disagrees with natural selection, that you can take various breeds of dogs... breed them, you get different kinds of dogs... It's just a fact of life... Where there's controversy is, Where do we say that a cell became a blade of grass, which became a starfish, which became a cat, which became a donkey, which became a human being? There's a real lack of evidence from change from actual species to a different type of species. That's where it's difficult to prove.

The ACTUAL definition of Natural Selection: The process whereby organisms better adapted to their environment tend to survive and produce more offspring. The theory of its action was first fully expounded by Charles Darwin and is now believed to be the main process that brings about evolution.

I'm not sure what you mean.

Can someone take her to the side every now and then and demand that she actually let them go over her speech for the evening? And please...while you're at it, make her go back the fuck to high school because apparently she didn't learn anything the first fucking time. Oh...and here's your answer to the whole creationism debate about the eye, Michele. Try to follow along.

Children Are Our Most Important Asset

This is disgusting in every conceivable way. This woman already has 2 children, ages 5 and 2. Her excuse for this? She needs to get herself together before she has more children. I don't think she ever should have had a child in the first place, and she damn sure shouldn't have "more" whether she gets it together or not. All the boyfriend can say is that he didn't know she was pregnant and it isn't his.

We have an infinite desire for valuable knowledge

That's why these priceless wells of knowledge were found in the bestsellers section of a Target in Tallahassee, Florida

The U.S. Military in general isn't that bad of a job....

I've heard people exclaim that one year of military service is equal to 3 years of stress compressed together... I found out the hard way by going into the Navy myself.  When I finally applied for VA benefits for medical and dental the VA made sure to send me my first piece of mail containing very important information.  They told me it's ok and I have someone to talk to.  Basically don't put that gun in your mouth because you've been through hell and got treated and paid like shit.

I'm pretty sure anyone who wants to kill themselves already know the warning signs.

You know, a good way to start making someone feel better about the shitty stuff they got screwed with during their time in is to actually spell their fucking name correctly.  My name is actually spelled as follows:  William Brandon Velez-Rivera.

You'd think they would have to actually look at a file with my fucking name on it and type it out correctly but they fucked that up.